Sunday, February 6, 2011

That Threatenen' Wacko Agenda


Pushing to tax the word of Christ like it was some kinda giant pyramid scheme
Promoting an end to burnin honest Clean Coal for a life in the cold and fearful dark
Putting trees, birds, fish and like clean air up front of families, jobs and christian values
Want us all eating that slimy soft tofu instead of good old supersize cheese fries

They’ll give your kids hands-on sex education, even before they learn to read
Said real hot water washing and nice clothes dryers are horribly evil polluters
Trying to make us turn down our thermostats and pull on some old itchy sweaters
Sponsoring some crazy bill to regulate barbecue and even lawnmower emissions

Lobbying to put the rights of cows and pigs above the price needs of decent consumers
Opposed to credit card bailouts meant to bring relief to us honest working families
Wantin us all eatin shriveled up organic muffins instead of hearty krispykremes
Would have us all smoking that dope sos we forget all about their elitist policies

Don’t like your nice green lawn and aim to close up all the golf courses
They’d like to force you to pick through dirty trash for junk they say needs recycled
Stoppin outside developers from bringing us in them good new construction jobs
Wantin to limit the size of your house and how much electricity you can use

Tryin to shove abortion, gay marriage and school prayer into the background
Foistin their tired, failed socialist universal healthcare schemes on us once again
Pushin fool laws to take away our sacred right to bear arms
Gonna even tax you for those few extry pounds that make you look real husky

Makin you quiet down your pickups and Harleys sos they can hear the stupid birds
Bannin your blazin security nightlights cause they want to save energy and see whatever stars
Forcin real sacrifice on families just to set an example in their fool greenhouse gas scam
Corrupting our children’s morals with their godless fuzzy science and junk maths

Want you to pass a test and get a license to have kids even though our God says to be fruitful
Plan on gutting our military and leaving us open to all kind of evil foreign terror
These wackos target our traditional lifestyle with that job-killing, costly hoax of climate change
Why they even want you to carry groceries on a bicycle like some frickin peasant

Out to make Big Gulps more expensive and ban double meat bacon cheeseburgers
Sayin Cheetos are unhealthy and Mountain Dew’s got too much sugar and caffeine
Don’t even want you throwing out fast food cups and bags and all that other messy shit
They’re wantin to tighten up on credit is threatenin our hallowed consumer lifestyle

Don’t even recognize the sanctity of the NFL or the importance of NASCAR to our way of life
Wanting to steal our relaxation and comfort and turn us all into pencilneck vegans
Their nutcake ideas are costing us real money, jobs and convenience every day
That wacko agenda is eroding our traditional family way of life, even as we pray

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