Well, I’ll give up my drive-thru lunch a coupla days each
week
Just sos that I can take the OHV out with the boys on
Saturday afternoon
I can get the old lady to cook shit out of cans or maybe
even from like raw stuff
Instead of nuking up them pricey microwave dinners that we
really like
Turning off the diesel sometimes instead of idling in
air-conditioned comfort
Just to save a teeny bit of that there artificially
expensive fuel
Adjusted my thermostat even though the kids just set there
whining
Had to make some changes cause the bill’s gone through the
roof
Gonna turn off the big screen when we’re not at home and
maybe unplug it at night
Damn electric keeps on going up every single month
Ta hell with that fancypants overpriced organic shit
My kids’ll do just fine on white bread and them
plastic-coated, factory-extruded hamburg logs
Look, I’m even walking all the way back out to the stinkin
mailbox
Drivin to grammaws instead of flyin - Which I hated anyway
Cant afford to trade in my 2 year old SUV even if it does
only get 10 MPG
So, but now I’m tryin to drive less than 20 thousand miles a
year
Cutting back to generic cookies and not watching so many
pay-per-views
That liberal climate conspiracy is costing us all a whole
lot of money every day
The old lady’s not getting botoxed and her toenails got the
colora yella baby shit
Gotta start savin somewhere, so first I cut out that
stupid fitness center I never go to
It’s for sure we won’t be attendin that awesome church ski
vacation this year
But we’ll still be able to ride our jet skis a few weekends
out to the lake
Wonderin about this family plan that costs $200 a month for
a coupla phones
After all I just spent 600 bucks on school sneakers the kids
tore up in a week
Have to share less quality time with my boys now that
bullets are $4 each
I’ll make it up to them though, at home playing them shooter
video games together
Switching credit cards to get a lower rate for at least the
next six months
Oughta free up some extry cash for when our mortgage rate
resets again
Cuttin back on pert near everything just like they slashed
my job and downsized my life
But still got enough time to catch NASCAR and the good old
NFL on the bigscreen with a cold one
However, not gonna enjoy them growlin snow machines as often
since they was repossessed
Waitin for the real belt-tightenin ta begin since them tax
and spenders are in control
Cut out the produce and the fruits too - sos we could still
have chips, cokes and Budweiser
Only seein the frickin ripoff dentist again when I cant
stand the pain no more
Gotdamm dogs’ll have to get by cause they ain’t going to the
vet again this year, either
Look
- We’re makin some real sacrifices up in the heartland for the good of family,
god and country
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